Wednesday, August 7, 2013

Extravert Frustrations

This blog focuses on introverts obviously but it is good to understand the extraverted point of view as well.  Some extraverted friends assure me that this is not a joke post but it is really how they feel:

http://www.buzzfeed.com/jessicamisener/frustrating-things-about-being-an-extrovert

Some of the points made, such as #12, were so foreign to me that I honestly thought this wasn't serious when I first read it.  While introverts are pretty widely misunderstood in my experience, being an extravert isn't always easy either apparently.

Sunday, August 4, 2013

An Introvert's Weekend

I honestly got a tad teary eyed while reading this.  It is so beautifully written.  I love this quote:

"To use melodramatic-but-honest terms: If I come to your birthday party, wedding, company picnic, or baby shower and I am quiet the whole time and/or I leave soon after, it means that I used the last of my strength to tell you I love you."

http://emspeaks.wordpress.com/2013/06/28/an-introverts-weekend/

How Introverts and Extroverts Can Peacefully Coexist

Many great suggestions for handling common situations in life...

http://lifehacker.com/how-introverts-and-extroverts-can-peacefully-coexist-638422576

Thursday, August 1, 2013

Thursday, July 25, 2013

A perfect example of the lost in thought INTJ

http://i.imgur.com/mjVN8vA.jpg

I suspect that I unknowingly cause similar feelings in friends and coworkers too.  Being a developer, this seems very true to me!

Thursday, July 18, 2013

Thursday, June 20, 2013

Amazing Personality Type Descriptions

This is an INTJ link but the site is the most accurate in describing all personality types that I've had the pleasure to read so far.  Enjoy!

http://www.16personalities.com/intj-personality-and-emotions

Saturday, May 4, 2013

A Misguided Introvert Teaching Article

Please excuse my short rant against this article:

"Introverted Kids Need to Learn to Speak Up at School"
http://www.theatlantic.com/national/archive/2013/02/introverted-kids-need-to-learn-to-speak-up-at-school/272960/

This is a really great example of how misunderstood introverts are and the incorrect assumptions made about them.  Basically, this is a self-admitted extraverted teacher forcing introverts to act like extraverts.  Any real science will tell you that introverts brains are physically different and that this can't/shouldn't be done.  Her world view is obviously U.S.-centric as she advocates extraversion as correct and the only path to follow... even though places like China, with way more population than the U.S., generally value introversion and see it as a sign of respect.  Finally, she obviously does not have a grasp of the difference in introversion and shyness.

"I am aware that as an extrovert, I naturally teach to and understand the needs of extroverts."
Kudos for being up front about this.  Now, exactly what makes you qualified to speak for introverts and how they should be taught?  Ah, you read some Susan Cain book.

"However, I also teach introverts, who live in fear of being asked these sorts of questions."
Introvert does not equal shy.

"If you can't speak up for yourself, if you can't muster the courage to tell the person you love that you love them, if you can't advocate for your own safety, the world will be a very intimidating and frightening place. I don't want my kids to be intimidated by the world."
Again, mixing up introversion and shyness.  Imagine Sheldon in Big Bang Theory.  He is certainly an introvert (ISTJ probably).  Does he have _any_ problem at all speaking up for himself?  Does he seem afraid of the world or intimidated by it?  I realize that this is a exaggerated fictional character but it is a great example that everyone can probably find to a lessor extent in their own interactions.


I'll speak a little about myself in school.  First, I was not very vocal because I am a very visual oriented person.  Auditory data is very hard for me to parse but I can take visual data and quickly interpret and expand upon it.  Written communications are more precise and understandable for me.  So visual vs auditory learning may be why some students are not "participating" as much as you would like.  Forcing extraverted behavior is probably detrimental to your students learning if they are in a similar situation.

Next up: While teachers were slowly talking their way through whatever topic was being discussed, I had already read the chapter we were on, understood it and was generally reading the next chapter (or usually chapters that the class would never cover if it was an interesting topic for me).  I was bored with the slow pace to be quite honest.  Most classrooms have to teach to the speed of the slowest learning members.  I hold no ill will and I know it is hard to make smaller, more agile classes.  When you force this oral participation, you mandate that kids stay at the same lowest common denominator rate that you are teaching.  That doesn't seem fair to the bored, faster learners in class.  But hey, they must just be scared little introverts that need to be brought out of their shell right?

Introverts need more time to process information.  See some previous articles for the science behind that.  This seems very applicable to iNtuitives as they need to understand how this new data fits into the web of knowledge they hold and understand the interactions that may result.  Sensors are able to take data for its face value and process it mentally more quickly.  Being intuitive is great for inventiveness and finding new ways to look at topics but it also slows down the processing of new data.  This means that some introverts and intuitive personality types may not be able to speak quickly to a new topic as they need time to digest the information.  Calling on a student that is in the process of internalizing information may disrupt the process and cause them to have difficulty answering in a way that makes sense.

Finally, let me talk a little about how insanely "anti-intellectual" kids were when I was in school.  Being smart was not "cool".  Being very smart was isolating and quite honestly caused me to be the victim of much physical and mental violence/bullying.  You know why I didn't raise my hand to answer a question (that I could usually practically answer in my sleep)?  I didn't want to get beaten up again or become more isolated!  So you force some poor smart kids to face that reality or make them basically lie and act stupid.  Yes, I've done that too.  I used to purposely miss just enough test answers to always make a C.  C is average right?  One year, I decided to make all Cs to stop messing up the grading curve for the rest of the class and hopefully become more accepted socially.  You may be contributing to more bullying with the view you have taken in this article.

Sunday, April 28, 2013

Myers-Briggs Chart

This is a very good high level chart to describe MBTIs.  For each color, most people tend to favor the left or right side.  This doesn't replace an MBTI test but it can help.

Saturday, April 13, 2013

Cognitive Functions

This topic is actually very important once you have discovered what your MBTI is.  I will use, surprise surprise, my INTJ personality type as an example for this article but please look up your own information to learn more about yourself.  We've covered what each of the letters means and how it shapes your thinking about the world already.  Now, let's discuss the default behavioral pattern hierarchy derived from the MBTI.

There is an order of behavioral preference or default role in which a person will be most comfortable based on personality type.  The order is defined (from most comfortable to least):
  • Dominant - the dominant information gathering function (Sensing or iNtuition)
  • Auxiliary - the decision making function (Thinking or Feeling)
  • Tertiary - usually develops more with age
  • Inferior - the least developed function, often viewed as the most problematic personality trait
Note: I will leave shadow functions for another discussion.

The INTJ cognitive functions are:
OrderFunctionRoleDescription
DominantIntroverted iNtuition (Ni)LeadingGreat at synthesizing complex data, foreseeing implications, attracted to symbolic actions or devices
AuxiliaryExtraverted Thinking (Te)SupportingEfficient, organized, productive, seeks logical explanations for events, searches for faulty reasoning, good at breaking down a complex task into smaller/manageable pieces
TertiaryIntroverted Feeling (Fi)ReliefValues such as harmony and authenticity, senses what is true vs. false, used to judge worth based on sometimes intangible criteria
InferiorExtraverted Sensing (Se)AspirationalFocuses on immediate and physical world experiences and sensations. Awareness of present surroundings. May lead to spontaneous action.

As can be extrapolated from above, INTJs tend to love big, complex problems to solve and like breaking down the problem to be solved in an efficient manner.  Nothing makes me more happy at work than to have to sit down for days or weeks to solve such a problem in an uninterrupted manner.  Luckily, many work places value this drive to solve hard problems and need to see the solution to fruition if the right position for the INTJ can be found.  I would likely be fired from a sales or marketing job (sensing and feeling oriented jobs) but engineering and science is very natural to me.

Each personality type has a cognitive function breakdown.  I encourage you to look yours up and understand yet another piece of your own needs, drive and goals.

This article is actually quite good in describing INTJ cognitive functions even though it is a comparison with another type:
http://psyphics.wordpress.com/2012/10/13/infj-vs-intj-part-1/

Sunday, March 24, 2013

The Introvert Need for Space

A friend posted this really great article titled "Introverts Explained: Why We Love You But Need to Get Away From You".

Having experienced this need to sometimes be alone in my own life and seeing how it unfortunately occasionally hurts those around me who don't understand, I thought I might provide some insight and suggestions to both introverts and extraverts that has helped in my own life.

Introverts
  • The first step is self realization that you are indeed an introvert.  Plenty of articles and tests in this blog will help you on your way.  Please, take them even if you don't think you are one because society often mixes shyness, awkwardness and other things with introversion confusing the process.
    • This may sound easy and obvious but I did not truly realize that I am an introvert and what it means until "mid life".
  • Internalize that most people do not think quite the same way you do, do not have the same types of needs as you and will often misunderstand/be hurt by some of your behaviors (including the need to be alone sometimes to recharge energy).
  • Do not assume that family and your closest friends are an exception to the rule above.  I made that mistake many times and have had to work hard to unwind the damage done by that assumption.
  • Be vocal about being a proud member of the introvert community and explain what it means and what it does not mean.  I even include a link in my email signature at work to my personality type description.  Again, society as a whole has a profoundly different view of what introversion means from reality sometimes.  Getting the word out will help you avoid misunderstandings in your own life and will help both introverts and extraverts get along better.
  • If you think something like: "Surely family/friends/co-workers understand that I need ..." then you probably need to explain what "..." is explicitly and reaffirm that it is not something they have done.  "..." for me is typically: space, time to think, time to unwind after work and such.
    • To some extraverts, it seems to be a serious insult to want to avoid their company so please explain what is happening.

Extraverts
  • Take the introversion tests.  There is a scale of introversion and it is good to understand where you lie on that scale.  It may explain why you are tired or grumpy sometimes (low on energy).  Nobody is 100% introvert or 100% extravert (that isn't in an insane asylum most likely).  Who knows, you may find that you are an introvert and a whole new way of life can be explored which may make you happier.
  • Read about introversion and try to understand what it really means.  It isn't a disease or mental problem.  It isn't something that can be overcome (nor should it).  It isn't shyness.  It isn't awkwardness or clumsiness.
  • If someone avoids you at times but seems to be friendly at other times, try to understand that they may be an introvert and need time to recharge energy (and they may not even know it!).

Thursday, February 28, 2013

INTJ Pet Peeves

I suspect some of the following post will apply to introverts in general but just to be safe... I'll stick with what I'm most familiar with: INTJs.

Have you ever gotten on the wrong side of an INTJ and have no idea why?  There can be several explanations for this INTJ behavior which have _nothing_ to do with your actions or behavior including:
  • The natural introvert need to spend time alone to regain energy
  • Really interesting thoughts/work consuming most of the INTJ's attention (this usually happens in relatively short bursts)
    • Imagine watching a season finale of your favorite sport or being engrossed in a movie and then having someone come up to you and start a casual conversation.  It is the same to an INTJ as hard as that must be for others to imagine.
  • INTJs just don't show emotion or facial expressions as readily as other personality types and are often mischaracterized as being aloof or angry when they are not
  • A stressed INTJ may be more withdrawn than normal
Introverts live in their heads more than extroverts so take time to examine other distractors before thinking that you have somehow crossed an introvert or INTJ.  Exhausted this line of reasoning already?  Then you may have unknowingly triggered an INTJ pet peeve.  There are many and I suspect these irritants are in some cases very different from other personality types which is why I'd like to provide a list of my own personal pet peeves (which generally match INTJ pet peeves):
  • Pushy salespeople
  • Surprises
    • We are big fans of planning and not being spontaneous in general
  • Don't make decisions for us
  • We dislike getting gifts, as it burdens us with the need to reciprocate
    • Let's just pretend that we both got each other gifts (that 99% of the time we don't like), returned them and call it even without actually going through the hassle.
  • We dislike holidays in general (Halloween is an exception, it is fun!)
    • Consumer driven holidays are the worst!  I hate being "forced" into buying something for someone for no apparent reason on a given day of the year.  I would rather see something that the recipient would like and buy it for them at that point.  Doesn't that require more thought and care than pulling a gift lever on a certain day?
  • We hate small talk, gossip, superficial social rules and relationship/people talk
  • We get particularly annoyed by attacks on our intelligence, competence, and integrity
  • We hate it when people try to manipulate us
    • Seriously, don't do this, we are largely immune to those tactics and we will think less of you for trying it
  • Insincerity, lying and backstabbing even if it isn't directed at us
  • People interfering with our alone time
  • People who are chronically late
    • I like the old saying that if you aren't 5-10 minutes early, you are late!
  • People who talk incessantly. We will just engage our “nod and smile” autopilot and mentally go somewhere else.
  • People who are incompetent, closed minded or arrogant
  • Superficiality
  • Emotional manipulation especially from salespeople.  We have zero tolerance for pushy salespeople.
  • People who waste our time (often salespeople, see a theme?)
  • We do not respect nonsensical rules, social "norms" or regulations just because they are there
  • Do not expect us to respect title or chain of command; it must be earned
  • Decisions or reasoning based on emotion
  • Highly structured environments with no room to uniquely solve a problem or improve process
  • Inefficiency
    • I think INTJs are almost OCD about making things run efficiently; really!
  • Manual or repetitive labor that can be automated
  • Personal questions unless they come from a close friend
  • Public criticism or trying to learn something new in front of a crowd
    • I may be weird here but I generally dislike public praise as well
  • Meetings without clear goals, especially auto-repeating meetings
  • Being pigeon-holed into specific positions or roles
  • Aggressive behavior used to circumvent logical analysis
    • Example: The person who pounds the table loudest or yells the loudest in a meeting decides direction
  • Randomly choosing direction or "shotgun approach" on projects to "see what sticks"
  • Open/distracting work environments; we value privacy
  • Forced and spontaneous brainstorming sessions without a chance to prepare in advance
  • Speaking "off the cuff" in a meeting; we prefer email where we can collect our thoughts
  • Phone calls (this must sound strange but text or email is much more efficient usually and the small talk can be avoided)
  • Not being valued especially in the workplace
    • We work hard to make efficient processes that run themselves so it is often not apparent how much work the INTJ put into setting everything up as it runs so smoothly
  • Leaving things open and unresolved
    • We want to cross items off the list as being resolved to focus on the next item
  • Messiness (we are organizers)
  • Being interrupted
    • I just saw a quote recently that sums it up perfectly: "Excuse me, did the middle of my sentence interrupt the start of yours?"
  • No notice of upcoming changes or a little time to internalize the change
  • Too much work load which causes the INTJ perfectionism to be discarded due to lack of time
  • Lack of meaningful achievement on a pretty regular basis
  • When someone answers a different question than what was asked or an attempt to "baffle you with B.S."
  • Having to repeat ourselves or thinking that we are not being heard
... and finally, "What is wrong?" and "Why are you mad?" questions when we are simply lost in thought and thus a big reason for this article.  It gets tiring to be accused of an emotion we aren't having so please try to understand us a little better and we'll try not to get totally lost in thought as often in public.  Deal? :)

I got some pet peeves from The Complete Idiot's Guide to the INTJ although most of this list is my own.

Saturday, February 23, 2013

Introverts and Brainstorming/Hackathons

Hackathons, hackfests, hack days and codefests oh my!  A few years ago, I never heard of these events and now they are so common you can't help but see them all the time.  There are many flavors of hackathons but I'll focus on the open to the public events where useable code is to be produced in a relatively short amount of time by a diverse set of developers.

The whole concept of this type of hackathon brings many thoughts to my mind as a veteran developer and designer:
  • How can a relatively disorganized group of developers create a cohesive and well written piece of functioning/debugged software in a very short amount of time (usually a night, day or weekend)?
  • Wouldn't the "festival" atmosphere which sometimes includes loud music, drinking, shows of various types and much socializing make focused concentration on developing software almost an impossibility?
  • What is the motivation of the hackathon organizer?  How many of these are publicity "stunts" for companies or products?  Some hackathons even charge developers to come provide a free service!?  Is this becoming to new "must do" thing/buzzword bingo for upper management in companies?

It then occurred to me that many hackathon-like organizers that I know are extraverts.  It seems to make intuitive sense as extraverts tend to be managers and organizers more often than not in my experience.  I'm sure some are not but...

My hypothesis is that this hackathon phenomenon came about by well-meaning, but in my opinion misled, extraverts (or introverts who buy in to the extraverted culture prevalent in the US currently) trying to focus developer energy in a social way.

Let's look at some data that I found:
By the very nature of most software developers being introverts, hackathons seem to go against many studies and research indicating how introverts work best.  Having said that, to the extraverted software developer community, hackathons must be refreshing and exciting events that can't come too often.  The networking and collaborative/fast-paced atmosphere must be amazing for that crowd; keep it up!  For the rest of (the majority) development community, perhaps hyper-social events aren't the solution.

So how can the positive networking and gathering of diverse expert backgrounds for a common purpose from hackathons be brought into an introvert friendly environment?  It seems like one of those "what is the meaning of life" (42, I know, I know) questions that can't be answered universally.  It isn't flashy in this day and age of hyper social environments but most introverts I know rely heavily on newsgroups, email lists, chat programs (IRC is common) or things like SourceForge.  Perhaps "flashy" isn't really necessary.


Disclaimer: This article may cause much disagreement in the community as this goes against the current trend of thinking, at least in the US and I'm sure there have been many successful hackathons.  This is the opinion of one introvert and is backed by some data from other articles/research.  The goal is not to convince anyone that this opinion is correct but to foster discussion and thought on this topic.  Thanks to my friend "E" who made a Facebook post that got me thinking about this topic.

Friday, February 22, 2013

Clifton Strengths Finder Test

I had to take this strengths finder test for work and found it to be pretty enlightening and very much on track with what I would expect for an INTJ such as myself.  There are 34 characteristics, according to Gallup, that define how an individual works/communications/gets inspired.  The top 5 characteristics are considered core strengths of one's personality.  Again, the iNtuition side of me loves verifying personality types from many different angles.  This test is based on the book "Now, Discover Your Strengths".  Here is a wiki page with more information:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Now,_Discover_Your_Strengths

Some people may feel these kinds of tests are invasive (especially if shared broadly at work like my workplace does) but I am a believer in the power of understanding personalities and learning how to correctly place them to be happiest and work with them to communicate efficiently.  If I have problems communicating with someone, I will often do a mental exercise of reviewing their past behavior and communication style to figure out their personality type.  I then look up how my personality type needs to communicate with them to avoid misunderstandings and distrust.  It is quite amazing how well this works when applied correctly and you'll soon find yourself adjusting communication style almost subconsciously after practice (more on this in another article).

This strengths finder test seems very well suited for identifying strengths and interests in the work place.  Using that knowledge, finding a position that is fulfilling should become much easier of a process.  I recently used this type of information to make adjustments to my own career.  Depending on the results, it also makes recommendations for personality types that should be sought out in the workplace to augment ones own strengths or help focus talent in the best way.  There are also suggested exercises for working on non-dominant strengths to become more well-rounded.

For those who are curious, is a really brief summary of my results from a paid test and my take on how each result corresponds to my INTJ personality:

  1. Achiever - one with a constant drive for accomplishing tasks
    • I believe my Judgment in INTJ is the driving force here which causes me to push myself and set high standards
  2. Learner - one who must constantly be challenged and learning new things to feel successful
    • This is probably from a combination of Introversion, frequently living mentally, and Judgment, need to push myself (INTJ)
  3. Ideation - one who is adept at seeing underlying concepts that unite disparate ideas
    • This seems to fall squarely on iNtuition or the need to find the underlying theory behind everything (INTJ)
  4. Intellection - one who enjoys thinking and thought-provoking conversation often for its own sake, and also can data compress complex concepts into simplified models
    • This seems to be a combination of iNtuition and Thinking (INTJ)
  5. Analytical - one who requires data and/or proof to make sense of their circumstances
    • Thinking all the way; everything needs hard proof and solid foundations (INTJ)

Really no surprise at all in the results.  If I would have been asked to pick which ones were most like me, I think these are the ones I would have selected after reading all 34 type descriptions.  This leads me to give some credence to the test itself based on other tests/observations.  If you take this test, please share how accurate it seems to you and always use professional guidance!

Tuesday, February 19, 2013

Five Factor Model Personality Profile

Psychology continues to gather data about the human personality in many different forms, experiments and observations.  One such model is called the Five Factor Model which attempts to estimate the "Big Five" personality traits.  Since I believe in making sure data correlates, which matches my Intuition trait in INTJ, I like taking multiple/different tests to gather a consensus.  The Five Factor Model (FFM) test not only includes an extraversion aspect but it also includes conscientiousness, neuroticism, agreeableness and openness.  I am a firm believer that it is important to understand yourself in order to more accurately find the things in life that make you happy (such as picking the right job/position to fit your personality among many other things).

There are many FFM tests out there and here is one that I took recently (again, please always seek professional testing as the accuracy of internet tests should not be considered necessarily accurate):

http://personality-testing.info/tests/BIG5.php
(Readers: I would love to hear your opinion about the accuracy of this test in comments!)

The scale for results ranges from 1 (low) to 5 (high).  For those interested, here are my results with an attempt at a description for each:

Extraversion: 1.6
This has been covered well in other articles on this blog but I am surprised that my score isn't a bit lower (more introverted) in this test as I usually score between 90-100% introverted on other tests.

Conscientiousness: 4.6
I agree that these traits describe me pretty well:
- self-disciplined
- dutiful
- planned rather than spontaneous behavior
- prepared
- detail oriented
- ordered
- follow a schedule

Neuroticism: 2.0
This result actually surprises me.  I thought I would be higher on the neuroticism scale but this test puts me below the middle point.  Someone highly neurotic would be easily stressed, worry, have anxiety, experience negative emotions and such.  Either the test isn't accurate or the world is more full of neurotic people than I thought.  This is food for thought/future investigation for sure!

Agreeableness: 3.2
I came out near the middle score on this trait so in general I would extrapolate this to mean...
- generally friendly and tactful but...
- sometimes put own interests ahead of the feelings of others and sometimes distant
It is never fun to admit to negative-sounding traits but I can see this as being pretty realistic for me.

Openness: 4.4
This seems pretty accurate to me:
- intellectually curious
- creative
- likely to hold unconventional beliefs
- facility for thinking in symbols and abstractions far removed from concrete experience
- vivid imagination

This is a chart showing the average results from test takers:


Studies have shown that these traits are roughly 50% inherited genetically (kind of punting on the old genetic vs society/environment debate).  The breakdown for each trait is as follows:
  • Extraversion - 54% hereditary
  • Conscientiousness - 49% hereditary
  • Neuroticism - 48% hereditary
  • Agreeableness - 42% hereditary
  • Openness - 57% hereditary

Age plays a factor in the trait ratings as well.  As one gets older (on average):
  • Agreeableness and Conscientiousness rise
  • Extraversion, Neuroticism and Openness decrease

In addition, brain structure plays a part in traits (which makes sense right?  Check out http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Big_Five_personality_traits for more details):
  • Neuroticism: negatively correlated with ratio of brain volume to remainder of intracranial volume, reduced volume in dorsomedial PFC and a segment of left medial temporal lobe including posterior hippocampus, increased volume in the mid-cingulate gryus.
  • Extraversion: positively correlated with orbitofrontal cortex metabolism, increased cerebral, volume of medial orbitofrontal cortex.
  • Agreeableness: negatively correlated with left orbitofrontal lobe volume in frontotemporal dementia patients, reduced volume in posterior left superior temporal sulcus, increased volume in posterior cingulate cortex.
  • Conscientiousness: volume of middle frontal gyrus in left lateral PFC.
  • Openness to experience: No regions large enough to be significant, although parietal cortex may be involved.

Sunday, February 17, 2013

INTJ Tantrums

While this isn't the most flattering description of INTJs, I think this captures the essence of why INTJs sometimes get upset at work and "shut down" for a while.  I believe this originally came from the INTJ Forum (apologies to the original author for not keeping the attribution; I have tons of notes I'm going through from many locations).  This may apply equally well to any **TJ personality types who tend to be detached, generally avoid emotions and have high J drive to complete work.  It is also complicated by the I(ntrovert) side as introverts generally seem to not highlight their own accomplishments in my experience.  I bolded key concepts below:


"I think we tend to throw tantrums when we forget the emotional reasons why we do things.

We tend to ignore emotion or treat it as an idea or object inside our minds.  Something we can just pick up and place about or just shuffle away when we're busy or don't want to be distracted.

Because of the J, we tend to be very goal driven perfectionists who kind of like to get stuff done as efficiently as possible.  This can cause us to pour too much of ourselves into something in trying to get it to work and work well.

The tantrum generally results when we've poured too much of ourselves into something and then kind of realize... Hey, why am I doing this?

The meaning that it previously had is suddenly under question because the emotions have changed.  Generally the reasons we started doing it in the first place no longer seem valid, or in short, it no longer seems worth it.

This can cause the INTJ to kind of shut down everything and refuse to budge until he can either figure out why he started doing it all in the first place or the process itself becomes more relaxed and pleasurable again.  This always causes friction however because it jars with the J need to see a task through to completion and the value, meaning and worth of said task.  It can come out of the blue where everything seemed to be going along fine and then suddenly the INTJ shuts down everything has a bit of a tantrum.

What people don't realize is that everything was going along fine because the INTJ was making sure everything was going along fine.  Generally, it did not just come about by happenstance or luck.  Our ultimate goal is to generally put in place a system so well that it can run itself so we can go back to doing whatever we were doing previously.  Thus, a lot of times, people don't realize the amount of work that we put into things because by its very nature its supposed to be unseen; it is designed to be unseen.

Generally I find INTJs throw tantrums if they feel like the work they are doing is not being valued or that nobody is on their side in things and they feel isolated.  They feel like they're doing all this work just for the sake of it, which unless we're doing it purely for ourselves and have no demands to meet, is not really fun.  While we come across as kind of cold and solemn people, most of the time the reason we do the things we do and hyper focus on doing them so well and efficiently, is for the very people around us.  If people don't seem appreciative or just kind of take it as a matter of fact then why would we care about or jobs or what we are doing?  Why are we doing it?  Why should we even try so hard?  There could be other things we could devote our time and energies to which could have better payouts.

This causes a crisis of evaluation where a cost/gain ratio analysis is being done regarding work put in and the emotion surrounding it to see if the activity is worth it."

Thursday, February 14, 2013

A Portrait of an INTJ


As an INTJ, I feel fairly qualified to provide a deep dive into the characteristics of this personality type.  While estimates of the introverted population generally hover around 25%, INTJs are a very rare breed at roughly 2% of the population (1% of women and 3% of men).  Many of you may have never even met an INTJ before as this is one of the rarest personality types in existence so let me provide some descriptions and personal input.

What is an INTJ (often described as "The Scientist", "The Strategist" or "Mastermind")?  The Myers-Briggs personality type (based on Carl Jung) expands this into:
I - Introversion
N - iNtuition
T - Thinking
J - Judgment

Keep in mind that the descriptions below indicate the most common mode of operation (not the only mode).  Humans are very complex and change modes depending on circumstances.

Introversion
The introvert:
  • ...is generally thought oriented first before engaging in action
  • ...seeks depth of knowledge and influence (as opposed to breadth which extraverts seek)
  • ...prefers substantial, meaningful and high content interaction (extraverts prefer frequent interaction)
  • ...recharges energy by spending time alone (and spends energy to be social) as opposed to extraverts who gain energy in social environments
I am usually rated between 90% to 100% on the introverted scale.

Intuition
This describes the mode of perceiving information (sensing is the counterpart to intuition).  Intuitive people tend to trust theoretical data, associations of data to build a consensus, data patterns, coherent context and underlying theories over the more sensing oriented population who primarily believe in what the five senses tell them.  I am almost borderline N and S.  I value real data but that data must be consistent with theories and patterns.  Ns tend to think/plan about the future (strategic) and Ss tend to think about the present (tactical).

Thinking
This describes the decision making process and the counterpart is feeling.  People with a thinking oriented personality tend to value detachment, logic, consistency, reason and rules that make sense.  Feeling people tend to value empathy, harmony and balance.  I've been developing some more F type behavior in the last few years which I think helps balance me out some socially.

Judgment
This category describes how people relate to the world: Judging or Perceiving.  **TJ types like to view the world as logical and like to have matters settled.  Perceptive people like to keep options and decisions open (being a high J, I must admit that I have a hard time dealing with perceptive people who won't settle on a decision/direction.)


There is so much to be said of INTJs (or any personality type).  I will provide some high level descriptions in this article and dive down into specific categories in other articles.  I will copy some quotes from many different sources (too many to give attribution unfortunately and in many cases no author is listed) but I think these are exemplary of the true INTJ:
  • "INTJs live in the world of ideas and strategic planning. They value intelligence, knowledge, and competence, and typically have high standards in these regards, which they continuously strive to fulfill. To a somewhat lesser extent, they have similar expectations of others."
  • "Anyone who does not have enough talent or simply does not see the point, including the higher ranks of management, will immediately and likely permanently lose their respect."
  • "They are natural leaders and excellent strategists, but willingly give way to others vying for a leadership position, usually people with Extroverted personalities... An INTJ will retreat into the shadows, maintaining their grip on the most important decisions – but as soon as the leader fails and there is a need to take the steering wheel, the INTJ will not hesitate to act, maybe even while staying in the background."
  • "INTJs dislike ... artificial limitations – everything should be questionable and open to re-evaluation."
  • "Masterminds do not feel bound by established rules and procedures, and traditional authority does not impress them, nor do slogans or catchwords. Only ideas that make sense to them are adopted; those that don't, aren't, no matter who thought of them. "
  • "INTJs are comfortable with abstraction and theory but gain the most satisfaction from turning their ideas into reality. They often enjoy working independently or with a small team, taking measured, strategic steps to implement change."
  • "INTJ personalities do not seek nor enjoy the spotlight and may often decide to keep their opinions to themselves if the topic of discussion does not interest them that much."
  • "INTJs are ambitious, self-confident, deliberate, long-range thinkers. Many INTJs end up in engineering or scientific pursuits... They dislike messiness and inefficiency, and anything that is muddled or unclear. They value clarity and efficiency, and will put enormous amounts of energy and time into consolidating their insights into structured patterns."
  • "They expect perfection from themselves as well as others and are comfortable with the leadership of another so long as they are competent."
  • "INTJ personalities rarely seek managerial positions – if they do, this is probably because they need more power and freedom of action, not because they enjoy managing people."
  • "... they find it very difficult to understand the complex social rituals that are considered part of the dating game, especially in Western societies. Things like flirting or small talk are unnatural to them; furthermore, INTJs (especially females) tend to see typical attraction tactics (such as feigning disinterest) as incredibly stupid and irrational."
  • "When under a great deal of stress, the INTJ may become obsessed with mindless repetitive, Sensate activities, such as over-drinking"
  • "The internal form of the INTJ's thoughts and concepts is highly individualized, and is not readily translatable into a form that others will understand. However, the INTJ is driven to translate their ideas into a plan or system that is usually readily explainable, rather than to do a direct translation of their thoughts."
  • "INTJs are natural leaders, although they usually choose to remain in the background until they see a real need to take over the lead. ... They are the supreme strategists - always scanning available ideas and concepts and weighing them against their current strategy, to plan for every conceivable contingency."
  • "The INTJ's interest in dealing with the world is to make decisions, express judgments, and put everything that they encounter into an understandable and rational system."
  • "Other people may have a difficult time understanding an INTJ. They may see them as aloof and reserved. Indeed, the INTJ is not overly demonstrative of their affections, and is likely to not give as much praise or positive support as others may need or desire. That doesn't mean that he or she doesn't truly have affection or regard for others, they simply do not typically feel the need to express it. Others may falsely perceive the INTJ as being rigid and set in their ways. Nothing could be further from the truth, because the INTJ is committed to always finding the objective best strategy to implement their ideas. The INTJ is usually quite open to hearing an alternative way of doing something."
  • "At work, the INTJ excels at creating and implementing innovative solutions to analytical problems. They naturally see possibilities for improvement within complex systems and are organized and determined in implementing their ideas for change."
  • "The ideal work environment for an INTJ is logical, efficient, structured, and analytical, with colleagues that are competent, intelligent, and productive."
  • "INTJs are introspective, analytical, determined persons with natural leadership ability. Being reserved, they prefer to stay in the background while leading."
  • "...approach reality as they would a giant chess board, always seeking strategies that have a high payoff, and always devising contingency plans in case of error or adversity."
  • "...observer, values solitude, perfectionist, detached, private... does not talk about feelings, hard to impress, analytical, likes esoteric things..."
  • "Unsurprisingly, this personality type can be labeled as the most independent of all types. INTJs are very decisive, original and insightful"
  • "Trying to anticipate every contingency, Masterminds never set off on their current project without a Plan A firmly in mind, but they are always prepared to switch to Plan B or C or D if need be."

Famous INTJs


My next article will provide a description of the INTJ personality type.  First, I will provide a list of famous (real and fictional) INTJs to provide examples.  It will be soon apparent that INTJs aren't the most lovable of personality types but many of these people have made great contributions.  I am including some villains as part of full disclosure and want to make it very clear that I don't condone their actions.  Even though I respect the intelligence and accomplishments of some of the people below, I don't necessarily agree with them in many aspects.

Take Bobby Fischer for example:  He was one of the most amazing and dedicated chess players that has ever lived but I extremely intolerant of his racism.

Also remember that some people may be misclassified as people don't wear an INTJ patch on their shirt so these may include incorrect educated guesses.

Famous INTJs
  • Isaac Newton
  • Karl Marx
  • Ayn Rand
  • Friedrich Nietzsche
  • John Maynard Keynes
  • Mark Zuckerberg
  • Bobby Fischer (Yay!  I'm a big chess fan.)
  • Garry Kasparov (Woot!  World champion chess player.)
  • John Adams
  • Isaac Asimov
  • Christopher Hitchens
  • H.L. Mencken
  • Heraclitus
  • Martin Luther
  • John Nash
  • Nikola Tesla (!!! Possibly the most brilliant person in history IMO !!!)
  • G.W.F. Hegel
  • Jane Austen
  • Jean-Paul Sartre
  • Stephen Hawking
  • Augustus (yes Caesar)
  • Hillary Clinton
  • Al Gore
  • Bill Gates
  • Dwight Eisenhower
  • Alan Greenspan
  • Ulysses S. Grant
  • Lewis Carroll
  • Cormac McCarthy
  • James Cameron
  • Arnold Schwarzenegger
  • Russell Crowe
  • Jay-Z
  • Roger Waters (Yay Pink Floyd!)
  • Jodie Foster
  • Julia Stiles
  • Elyse Sewell
  • Angela Lansbury
  • Arthur Ashe
  • C. Everett Koop
  • Calvin Coolidge
  • Charles Rangel
  • Chester A. Arthur
  • Chevy Chase
  • Dan Akroyd
  • Donald Rumsfeld
  • Dwight D. Eisenhower
  • Edwin Moses
  • Colin Powell
  • Greg Gumbel
  • Hannibal Barca
  • Ivan Lendl
  • James K. Polk
  • Joan Lunden
  • Josephine Tey
  • Katie Couric
  • Lance Armstrong
  • Maria Shriver
  • Martina Navratilova
  • Michael Dukakis
  • Orel Hershiser
  • Pernell Roberts
  • Peter Jennings
  • Raymond Burr
  • Rudy Giuliani
  • Susan B. Anthony
  • Thomas Jefferson
  • Veronica Hamel
  • William F. Buckley, Jr.
  • William J. Bennett
  • Woodrow Wilson
... and unfortunately there are some very unsavory INTJs such as:
  • Vladimir Lenin
  • Anders Breivik
  • Ted Kaczynski


Fictional INTJs
  • Clarice Starling (Silence of the Lambs)
  • Hannibal Lecter (Silence of the Lambs)
  • Dr. Jonathan Crane (Batman Begins)
  • Ellen Ripley (Alien)
  • Ensign Ro Laren (Star Trek: The Next Generation)
  • Ernst Stavro Blofeld (James Bond)
  • Gandolf (Lord of the Rings)
  • Marsellus Wallace (Pulp Fiction)
  • Michael Corleone (Godfather)
  • Vito Corleone (Godfather)
  • Tom Hagen (Godfather)
  • Mr. Burns (The Simpsons)
  • O-Ren Ishii (Kill Bill Vol. 1)
  • Professor Moriarty (Sherlock Holmes)
  • Rosencrantz and Guildenstern (Hamlet)
  • Stewie Griffin (Family Guy)
  • Vicious (Cowboy Bebop)
  • Mr. Darcy (Pride and Prejudice)
  • Gregory House (House M.D. - might be INTP or ENTP)
  • Aaron Hotchner (Criminal Minds)
  • The Brain (Pinky and the Brain)
  • Howard Hughes (The Aviator)
  • Sheldon Cooper (Big Bang Theory - might be ISTJ)
  • Kimball Cho (The Mentalist)
  • John Sheppard (Stargate Atlantis)
  • Christina Yang (Grey's Anatomy)
  • Voldemort (Harry Potter)
  • Ron Swanson (Parks and Recreation)
  • April Ludgate (Parks and Recreation)
  • Batman (in some incarnations, definitely not in others)
  • Benjamin Linus (Lost)
  • V (V for Vendetta)

Tuesday, February 12, 2013

Humor Video: Caring for an Introvert


This is a humorous video about 12 behaviors that introverts usually dislike... quite a bit.  The extravert in the video is way over the top but don't let that hinder the good points being made:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pmf4T1J3rhk
  1. Respect their need for privacy
  2. Never embarrass them in public
  3. Let them observe first in new situations
  4. Give them time to think.  Don't demand instant answers.
  5. Don't interrupt them
  6. Give them notice of expected changes in their life
  7. Give them 15 minutes warning to finish what they are doing before moving to the next activity
  8. Reprimand them privately  (Note: I also generally like private rewards as well.)
  9. Teach them to use new skills privately rather than in public
  10. Enable them to find one best friend who has similar interests and abilities
  11. Do not push them to make a lot of friends
  12. Respect their introversion.  Do not try to make them into extraverts.   (!!!!)

Sunday, February 10, 2013

Shyness and Introversion


This may be a surprise to many readers but shyness is very different from introversion.  We will begin with definitions first:

Shyness: The feeling of apprehension, lack of comfort or awkwardness experienced when a person is in proximity to, approaching or being approached by other people, especially in new situations or with unfamiliar people.

Here are some shyness tests.  I haven't found many good tests as the questions are fairly transparent usually and as always, seek professional guidance rather than rely on amateur internet tests:
http://shynesssocialanxiety.com/am-i-shy-shyness-test/

Introversion: The state of or tendency toward being wholly or predominantly concerned with and interested in one's own mental life.
[See previous posts for introversion tests.]

Here are some examples of real and fictional characters that may show the combinations of shyness and introversion (or the lack thereof):
  • Shy (and probably introverted): Raj Koothrappali character in Big Bang Theory
  • Not shy and introverted: Sheldon Cooper character in Big Bang Theory
  • Shy and extraverted: Barbra Streisand
  • Not shy and extraverted: Oprah Winfrey (at least her TV personality)

The key point is that introverts choose more solitary activities out of genuine preference (where they can build up their energy and explore their thoughts) and shy people avoid social events out of discomfort or fear.  From an outsider's point of view, it may be difficult to tell the difference.  This difference can lead to misunderstandings.  Another point to remember is that, in general, shyness can be overcome with professional support but introversion cannot (there is nothing wrong with introversion).

Trying to force social interactions on an introvert may cause the introvert to become tired, grumpy and make the introvert pull away from interactions to regain energy.  Friends may think something is wrong and try to pull the introvert "out of the shell" even more causing a cycle of misunderstanding.  This misunderstanding can be especially difficult if the introvert does not know that they are an introvert and do not understand why they are having these seemingly anti-social feelings.

It is difficult for me to speak to a shy example as my shyness test results show that I am about average in shyness but I'll try... (please readers, if you are shy, I would love to hear your opinions!)  Friends trying to pull a shy but extraverted friend "out of the shell" may meet with greater success once the social fears are overcome.  The individual may even be glad that their friends pushed a little.  Again, this is pure guesswork for sake of example.  I am not a doctor.

It is important to remember that introverts need and crave social bonding and get lonely like anyone else but they do not need as much social stimulation.  They do not want to be left alone completely; please keep this in mind.

Another interesting aspect of shyness is the cultural acceptability around the world.  According to some articles that I've read, someone who is shy may be considered a coward in the US but in China a shy person may be looked up to and praised.

Saturday, February 9, 2013

How Do I Know If I Am An Introvert or Extrovert?


I have found that the Myers-Briggs Personality Type tests have been very accurate in describing my own characteristics.  There are many tests available and they should all, especially the online tests, be used as general guidance rather than strict fact.  Only a trained professional can accurately determine ones personality type and even they are fallible.  This is a good list of online tests:

http://pstypes.blogspot.com/2009/03/free-jungian-type-tests.html

I would recommend taking several tests to gain a consensus before looking up the detailed description of your own personality type.  Some people find that knowing what their personality type is "supposed to be" will influence their choices on later tests.  Once you have some convergent results, there are many places to gain a detailed understanding of a given personality type.  Here is a simple and powerful description of personality types and what they mean:

http://www.personalitypathways.com/type_inventory.html

It is important to remember that there is no good or bad personality type.  All are equally valid and needed in society.  Imagine how dull society would be if everyone thought and reacted the exact same way!  Without divergent thoughts and approaches to various topics stirring up conversation and deep thinking, society could make incredibly bad decisions...

I believe that many bad decisions in history could have been avoided if all personality types shared equal value in discussions and decision making.  When fear, might or bullying is used to shut down the opinion of others, bad outcomes often follow.

Friday, February 8, 2013

Introvert and Extrovert Brains Are Different

This is one of the most amazing discoveries that I found in my research on introverts.  Our brains work in very different ways!

Introverts brains are more focused on acetylcholine and extroverts are focused on dopamine and adrenaline (thus the need for more excitement).  Introverts have more blood flow in the brain and use a longer pathway to process input (which is probably why we have issues "talking off the cuff" in front of large audiences).



http://musingsonmormonism.wordpress.com/2012/09/17/easily-the-most-fascintaing-and-illuminating-comparison-of-introversion-and-extroversion-ive-ever-seen/

Responding to Standard Greetings

On a slightly humorous (but true) note, this is something I struggle with every day.  How does one respond to normal greetings such as "How's it going?"  It triggers a rush of thoughts in my mind... does this person really want to know or are they just saying something to be polite?  Do I answer truthfully or should I basically lie and say "Great!  Couldn't be better!"?  This may be more of an INTJ personality type topic (more on that in other posts) but I suspect other introverts have the same thought process that hinders them until it is almost too late to answer as someone is walking by.  I imagine extroverts must think I'm totally weird and rude as I struggle to process all of the thoughts to this seemingly simple question and utter something that is "socially acceptable" for the time and place.

http://intjforum.com/showthread.php?t=78690

Introverts Need Not Apply: The Problem With a World That Chooses Extraverts

I will create a separate post describing my specific experiences with this type of extrovert bias in the workplace.  It is very common unfortunately and is a detriment to both introverts and to the businesses that are filled with a resonance chamber of extraverted opinions.

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/shyness-is-nice/201203/introverts-need-not-apply-the-problem-world-chooses-extraverts

The Soft-Spoken Power of Introverts

This article and series of videos provides great insight as to when and why the US changed from a generally introverted society into a relatively hyper-extroverted society:

http://www.govexec.com/excellence/promising-practices/2013/02/soft-spoken-power-introverts/61171/

Dr. Carmella's Guide to Understanding the Introverted

This human-sized hamster ball cartoon example of introversion even resonated with some of my super extroverted friends.

http://themetapicture.com/guide-to-understanding-the-introverted/

Caring for Your Introvert



Jonathan Rauch wrote a fantastic article about detecting introverted behaviors in people you know (or in my case, myself) and how introverts are often misunderstood:

http://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2003/03/caring-for-your-introvert/302696

10 Myths About Introverts


This amazing article written by Carl King can be found at:
http://www.carlkingdom.com/10-myths-about-introverts

(I'm copying some of the article here in case the site disappears but will happily remove it if the author wishes.  It was one of the first articles about introversion that I read and it really helped me understand that many others out there are just like me.)

Myth #1 – Introverts don’t like to talk.
This is not true. Introverts just don’t talk unless they have something to say. They hate small talk. Get an introvert talking about something they are interested in, and they won’t shut up for days.

Myth #2 – Introverts are shy.
Shyness has nothing to do with being an Introvert. Introverts are not necessarily afraid of people. What they need is a reason to interact. They don’t interact for the sake of interacting. If you want to talk to an Introvert, just start talking. Don’t worry about being polite.

Myth #3 – Introverts are rude.
Introverts often don’t see a reason for beating around the bush with social pleasantries. They want everyone to just be real and honest. Unfortunately, this is not acceptable in most settings, so Introverts can feel a lot of pressure to fit in, which they find exhausting.

Myth #4 – Introverts don’t like people.
On the contrary, Introverts intensely value the few friends they have. They can count their close friends on one hand. If you are lucky enough for an introvert to consider you a friend, you probably have a loyal ally for life. Once you have earned their respect as being a person of substance, you’re in.

Myth #5 – Introverts don’t like to go out in public.
Nonsense. Introverts just don’t like to go out in public FOR AS LONG. They also like to avoid the complications that are involved in public activities. They take in data and experiences very quickly, and as a result, don’t need to be there for long to “get it.” They’re ready to go home, recharge, and process it all. In fact, recharging is absolutely crucial for Introverts.

Myth #6 – Introverts always want to be alone.
Introverts are perfectly comfortable with their own thoughts. They think a lot. They daydream. They like to have problems to work on, puzzles to solve. But they can also get incredibly lonely if they don’t have anyone to share their discoveries with. They crave an authentic and sincere connection with ONE PERSON at a time.

Myth #7 – Introverts are weird.
Introverts are often individualists. They don’t follow the crowd. They’d prefer to be valued for their novel ways of living. They think for themselves and because of that, they often challenge the norm. They don’t make most decisions based on what is popular or trendy.

Myth #8 – Introverts are aloof nerds.
Introverts are people who primarily look inward, paying close attention to their thoughts and emotions. It’s not that they are incapable of paying attention to what is going on around them, it’s just that their inner world is much more stimulating and rewarding to them.

Myth #9 – Introverts don’t know how to relax and have fun.
Introverts typically relax at home or in nature, not in busy public places. Introverts are not thrill seekers and adrenaline junkies. If there is too much talking and noise going on, they shut down. Their brains are too sensitive to the neurotransmitter called Dopamine. Introverts and Extroverts have different dominant neuro-pathways. Just look it up.

Myth #10 – Introverts can fix themselves and become Extroverts.
A world without Introverts would be a world with few scientists, musicians, artists, poets, filmmakers, doctors, mathematicians, writers, and philosophers. That being said, there are still plenty of techniques an Extrovert can learn in order to interact with Introverts. (Yes, I reversed these two terms on purpose to show you how biased our society is.) Introverts cannot “fix themselves” and deserve respect for their natural temperament and contributions to the human race. In fact, one study (Silverman, 1986) showed that the percentage of Introverts increases with IQ.